Compassion--letting go of perfectionism

This week we explored the theme of Compassion in our daily sessions. Bloom Pause is a community offering that meets remotely using Zoom. Each week we explore a new theme through discussion, sharing, meditation, and practices to improve daily life. If you'd like to join Bloom Pause, sign up here.

In Brene' Brown's book The Gifts of Imperfection, she offers 10 guideposts for cultivating wholehearted living. Each of these guideposts suggests letting go of something towards cultivating a gift... guidepost number 2 Cultivating Self-Compassion... Letting go of perfectionism...

"Where perfectionism exists, shame is always lurking. In fact, shame is the birthplace of perfectionism."

Perfectionism is a shield... thinking it will protect us ... however, it's really preventing us from taking flight and experiencing true connection.

Perfectionism is a mask ... thinking it will win us approval and acceptance for achievement and accomplishment ... however, it's really other focused and causing us to lose by preventing true belonging.

Perfectionism is a belief system ...

  • If I look, live, and do things perfectly, I can control my experience of pain...
  • It's all my fault because I'm not perfect enough ...

These are traps because the mechanism of perfectionism actually leads to the very pain of avoiding judgment, blame, shame, and the like, that it's trying to avoid.

"To overcome perfectionism, we need to be able to acknowledge our vulnerabilities to the universal experiences of shame, judgment, and blame; develop shame resilience; and practice self-compassion."

Suggested Practice:

PAUSE

Call in Awareness.

Notice what's happening within ...

Call in Compassion ...
Feel it expand in the heart center...

I Am Aware of my breath with Compassion ...
I Am Aware of my body with Compassion ...

 

Try these words out loud:
I surrender my shields to the wisdom of my soul...
I surrender my masks to the wisdom of my soul...
I plant seeds of intention according to this wisdom...
I offer this to the Divine for the highest good and optimal outcome.
I offer gratitude as if it has already occurred.

In Bloom Unity,

Maria Mellano

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